out the dirty car window, a regret.

i see myself out that smudged window, i am leaving myself in the dust. right where i have fallen.

but can i wave goodbye tenderly?

i am in the car, going towards my future. i am broken on the road, spilled like paint to a canvas, watching myself run into brightness. i watch myself achieve things. but it is still i, who am left in the dust,

i'm out the dirty car window, a regret.

i regret not running to him, not stopping him, not pulling him quite near. i regret not showing what i really was. i regret the pretending. i regret not saying what i really meant to him, for i am afraid that every moment we say goodbye will be the last.


so i will say it now. where you will never find it, even though by now, you're on the plane. and you know with all your heart you are coming back to me. and you love me, and i love you.

that is it.

I love, you.